• What is truth? Can we know the truth?
• What comprises the happy life? Can we live it?
• What is the relationship of the order of the created world and evil? Does the order of the created world ensure that evil does not increase?
• What is the soul? Why is it so important?

These are the questions St. Augustine wondered about from his late teens all the way up to shortly after his conversion to Christianity.

Saint Augustine (c.1645-c.1650)

by Philippe de Champaigne

The Spiritual Journey of St. Augustine

In August of 386, when he was 31 years old, Augustine converted to Christianity after a very long and complicated spiritual journey (which in large part was related to these questions) that led him to abandoning his simple Christian upbringing, to joining the Manichaean heretical group, to cohabiting with his mistress for close to 16 years, and to finally settling on Skepticism, which in the ancient world referred to a philosophical position that claimed to not be able to know anything about the truth.  In other words, this was an extreme form of atheism and nihilism.

Things began to change when he crossed paths with St. Ambrose, a charismatic preacher and intellectual who was the bishop of Milan, in the city where St. Augustine had opened a school whose students failed to pay him at the end of the year.  When he met St. Ambrose, he was struck by two things: first the character of St. Ambrose, and second, the fact that St. Ambrose could answer the questions that he thought were so unanswerable with not only strong answers, but also with a gentle disposition.

This led to St. Augustine taking the Christian faith seriously, and unlike in his childhood, he began to engage it with understanding.  This led to his reading Christian literature such as the epistles of the Apostle Paul and The Life of Antony by St. Athanasius.  Reflecting on the faith of his mother (and also more mysteriously being guided by her prayers for nearly two decades), and the faith of St. Ambrose and the Christian community, and what little he now correctly understood from the Scriptures, he came to believe, with the list of the questions I mentioned above still unanswered.

That may seem strange, and it may seem irrational, but it actually isn’t.  Christianity is not a faith whose main channel is the mind, nor is it a faith whose main channel is the heart, but it is a living faith of the whole human being.  For that reason, we convert when we assent to the life of Christ and His Church, even though we may have lingering questions.  To give an analogy, it is like how we assent to going to a graduate school even though we know it will be so incredibly hard.  We assent not because we have answered our questions, nor because it feels good (because graduate school is anything but comfortable), but because we have seen the community that has graduated from such schools and those that are finishing their course in there, and we see what type of people they have become, so we assent to that way of life even though we may not feel comfortable or have all of our questions answered.  It is the transformation that we see in others that draws us in, so we have faith that we too can have that state of being.

This is the best way I can explain the conversion of St. Augustine.  (It would also be good to reflect on most people’s conversion stories and whether they resemble his).

The Retreat at Cassiciacum

Following his conversion, St. Augustine and his mother, his son, his brother, a few of his friends, and two of his students retreated to a villa on the estate of one of his friends where they spent the late summer of 386 through spring of the following year.  This estate was called Cassiciacum.

Early in the retreat, in November of 386 (before, during, and after his 32^nd birthday which was on November 13), he framed his questions better and began (and only began) to answer them over a series of discussions with all of these people involved.

What is truth?  Can we know the truth?

The first of these conversations addressed the questions: “What is truth?” and “Can we know the truth?”

He had this discussion with his friends, his students, and his son.  This discussion was recorded in dialogue form in the book titled Against the Academics.  As I mentioned above, the Academics were hardcore Skeptics who descended from Plato’s Academy, but radically departed in worldview from Plato’s original vision.  They claimed that there is something known as truth, but we can never know it, but only know something having the appearance of truth.

If you have ever read St. Augustine, you know how beautiful his style of writing is and how the ideas flow smoothly, but these early conversations do not have that polish, as you can bear in mind that these are his earliest writings.

Rather, what this conversation models well for us, especially for us Christians who have an intellectual side, is how to approach these questions honestly, coherently, and logically and what type of labor we must go through in framing and reframing the questions and testing the coherence of the answers given to these questions.

The reason he had ever raised these deep questions was because the Bible makes claims, and if we cannot know the truth, then it doesn’t matter if the Bible’s claims are true because we can never know what is true.  But, if we can know the truth, then we can determine whether the Bible’s claims are true or not.

The conclusion that he and his group arrive at is that we can indeed know the truth because of three principles which are now known in philosophy as:

1. The Law of Identity
2. The Law of Non-Contradiction
3. The Law of the Excluded Middle

although they are not referred to by these names in the dialogue.  This is an important conclusion for those who doubt the possibility of knowing the truth because these three principles help us cancel out what is certainly not true and can help us gain greater confidence in the possibilities that remain.

What comprises the happy life?  Can we live it?

Then St. Augustine on the day of his birthday, November 13, and the following two days gave his friends what he called “a banquet,” but not of food, but rather of ideas and rational delight (“rational” in the ancient world refers to both the soul and the mind; they are the same in ancient thought).

We often have a lot of thoughts on our birthdays, specifically about our origins, our span of life both past and future, and we become increasingly sensitive to how old we are becoming.  I even had a student a few years ago who was afraid of her birthday.  But in the midst of all this, we think about what it is that makes us happy.

This “banquet” (which was really another conversation) was recorded in dialogue form as The Happy Life.

During the course of three days, they taking into account some of their conclusions of the previous discussion Against the Academics (which was actually still ongoing), turned to consider the question of what comprises the happy life and whether we can live that life.

St. Monica, his mother, or whom he called “our mother,” in the dialogue (because of her standing and the fact that she was the only baptized Christian among the group) took part in this discussion and the following one.

It is actually a discussion with a suggestion, a framing of the issue, but not a clear conclusion.  Ancient philosophical dialogues sometimes ended this way, not as a waste of time, but as a way of showing us that there is value even in framing the issue correctly and discussing upon clear lines of reasoning, even if we do not arrive at a conclusion.  This is so because we will learn how to view the matter (which is the reality of a happy life) better, and so our attention will be tuned to finding the happy life.

What is the relationship of the order of the world and evil?  Does the former ensure that evil does not increase?

Then on November 16, in the middle of the night while the house was dark and everyone was supposed to be asleep, St. Augustine hears the sound of water flowing in different rhythms and magnitude in the baths next to the villa.

For those of us who are given over to contemplation and musing about the world, you know that something like this is enough to trigger deep reflections about the world.  This is what happens with St. Augustine and he starts thinking about the predictability of the order of the universe (due to the cause and effect cycle) and then he hears that his students are awake in the next room.  So he, while still on his bed in his room in the darkness and they in their room on their beds in the darkness, asks a question about the change in the predictability of the water flowing through the baths and raises the discussion about the order of the world.  They start having the discussion in the darkness in the dead of night and fill the house with their musings.

The discussion goes into the next day.  This conversation broaches upon many topics and considers the occurrence of evil in the world (something that has always raised thoughtful reflection from believers and non-believers alike) and how that relates to the order of the world.  One clear conclusion he arrives at is that it absorbs evil and returns the world back to its order, which is inherently good.  He also explores how the order of the universe in the cause and effect cycle is different from the pagan philosophical idea of fate.

He then explores the nature of the soul and the role of education (think classical education, not our broken modern system) and how that develops the rational soul (remember that mind and soul are the same in ancient thought) and allows it to begin to apprehend and approach God.

This discussion was recorded in dialogue form under the Latin title De Ordine, which means On Order, but this is not the name that it is known by in English; in the famous English translation it is known as Divine Providence and the Problem of Evil.

This book is fairly packed with different ideas.  And like I said these dialogues frame and reframe the questions in order to teach us how to see rightly.  And remember they are earliest thoughts of the Christian Augustine.  For that reason, they remain more suggestive than conclusive, although there are some strong conclusions here and there.

What is the soul?  Why is it so important?

Then some time later, either in late November or early December, St. Augustine wrote a contemplation he had and framed it as a dialogue with his Reason (that is the rational soul, which is the bearer of the Image of God in all humans and is largely the same in all humans since it is shared by all of them) and himself (that is Augustine the historical individual who had lived in a specific place, a specific time, spoke a specific language, and had specific experiences).  It is a large reflection upon the nature of the soul including such things as its immortality, capability for wisdom, virtue, and the approach to God and the relationship between all of these things.

It is a musing and an internal discussion within himself, so he called it Soliloquies.  He invented that word to mean a discussion between oneself and Reason (St. Augustine, pg. 337).

He later continued the reflection upon the soul in his book On the Immortality of the Soul (which is also a dialogue) the following spring shortly before his baptism.

You can find these four dialogues at Cassiciacum in one volume from the Fathers of the Church series by clicking here.

Easter Eve 387

Five months after his initial dialogues, he was baptized with his son, his friends, and his students.  All of them entered into the faith because he diligently sought the answers to these questions, which form the basis of a meaningful life.  He found them in the Church of our Lord Jesus Christ.

St. Monica’s Smile

But there is something that caught my attention about halfway through the dialogue The Happy Life, St. Augustine mentions that his mother smiled as she was engaged in the discussion with them and saw it progressing.  I have thought about what that smile meant ever since I read The Happy Life, and I probably will remember it until the end of my life.  It is one of the most memorable moments I have read in any literature.  That smile by itself speaks volumes, and unlike some of the conversations in these dialogues, it is conclusive.

She had prayed for and wept over him for so many years seeing him go down so many winding paths, some which were very dark.  And now he (and not only him but his brother, his son, his friends, and his students) was musing philosophically about the Christian faith and showing the incoherence of other philosophical systems when compared with Christianity. Using all the gifts and education he had, he was now using that education to approach and find God.  But not just him, but also his son, his brother, his friends, and his students.  He showed us how to frame the questions.  Then later as he grew in his faith and learned from the Fathers, he gave us answers, and most of his answers stand until today.

She had been asking God for him alone.  She had been asking for a drop of water, but God gave her the whole ocean.  And even more, she did not live to see how much he grew in his faith and understanding and how he became the greatest Latin Church Father.  She died either a few weeks or a few months after he was baptized.  How many came to Christ because of St. Augustine the young questioning intellectual!  How many go the same path today and have no answers?  But they do because he provided them for us.  And indeed, many still continue to come to Christ because St. Augustine provides answers for many of the doubts that moderners have.  This is especially true in his later writings.  Countless people in the course of history were saved because of his writings and countless more will up until the end of the world.  Perhaps for that reason she is our mother too.

If you found benefit from this blog entry, click here to like my Facebook page here OR sign up to my email list to receive my latest blog entries every week in your inboxes, and you will also receive my free eBook The Way of Christ.  Click here to sign up.